Are you enjoying your life?

A friend of mine asked me that question the other day and before blurting out " isn't that a rather obvious question" I held my tongue and heard her out, and her sentiments as it turned out, were valid.

That single question triggered a string of questions -rhetoric in nature of course. Am I living each new day as if it were a gift? -because in essence it is. Do I let the people that I love and care about know that I do and often? Do I treat those around me with the same respect and regard that I expect in return? Do I go out of my way to offer help whenever I can and apologize when I can't without overburdening myself? If I want to do something do I just go ahead with it or drive myself crazy with the back and forth "should I" or "Should I not?" Am I worrying less, hoping more and loving myself most? Am I embracing all things positive or am I unnecessarily blowing up every problem? As for my soul what am I feeding it? And what about my intellect -am I tending to that too?

Life is too short -a phrase you'll never hear enough of- so live right and delight in the moment. Stop once in a while to give yourself a pat on the back for achievements made or a pep talk if you're in need of one. Don't take on commitments that you well know you won't have time for only to further complicate your life; just say no if its too much. Appreciate your friends, check up on them every once in a while and be there for them when they call on you. Always realize the worth of family, dysfunctional as it maybe, you're blessed to still have them around unlike many. Don't pass up an opportunity to do some good, it always comes back to you in folds. Don't take your health lightly either, because until you're lying helpless on a bed fighting for your life you might not quite comprehend the value of it. Don't let it get there. Eat right and put in some exercise every once in a while, it won't kill you and your body will thank you for it. As for all those things you're always planning to do for yourself (solely for self-gratification) but you keep putting them off presumably as unimportant, get to them. You should be your number one priority, period.

Treat yourself well and be kind to yourself, only then can you treat those around you as such.

A random thought if I may..

I dislike whiners, I'm sorry but there's no subtle way to put it. In any given situation there are two options; either there's something you can do about it or not. None of that includes sitting around complaining to anyone that's within earshot about your oh so catastrophic woes. There are folk who cannot see the good in anything and I mean ANYTHING. They'll never take a complement -always quick to jump in and put themselves down when given one. They are a suspicious lot too always sighting ill motive.

Now you'd better steer clear of these guys or they will wear you out, literary. Why would anyone have such a bleak outlook on life? I mean we all have issues but half the time most of them are self imposed and I don't see how constantly complaining about a problem rectifies it. Get off your bum and do something about it. Feeling overloaded lately? Maybe what you need is some re-organization in your life and re-evaluation of priorities. Feeling drained in your relationship? Maybe its time to head on out or pump some life into it.

Point is, if something's bugging you, you need to articulate it, weigh your options then get off your ass and do something about it. Not go around whining about every-single-thing-that-ain't-right-about-your-life and basically annoying everyone in the process.

And remember the best way to predict your future is to create it.

Peace.

Putting away work for the day - stopped midway of whatever I was doing, closed my worksheets (well I remembered to save them lol) withought a second thought- tomorrow is another day. I literary have to stop myself seeing as how I've become quite the workaholic lately, a fact further stressed on by my adorable man. When there's work to be done, and you actually get it done without procrastinating, you'd think this would ease the pile up on your desk but it only translates to 'efficient' a word the bosses love and that further translates into MORE workload -not a payrise- on your desk. I'm hard on trying to break that cycle before I have a meltdown...sigh

Blogging however is the highlight of my day...it's therapeutic. I like to jog -one of the many positive habits I'm picking up (will revisit that later)- and I find that my thoughts are at their most free when I jog, I can almost hear my conscience whisper to me in the wind... it's my worst critic and fervent adviser. I got to thinking, how most of the answers we seek are already lodged somewhere in our subconscious, but we're so busy scampering about - sometimes devoid of direction or purpose- to take note. It would spare us all a whole lot of trouble if for a moment -preferably before jumping into situations that could very well be averted- we would stop and bloody pay closer attention to our intuitive senses. I've learnt a thing or two about that myself I've lost count of the number of times I've had to kick myself for not listening to my sixth sense and I must say nothing sounds more annoying than my own conscience yelling at me..."I told you so sweetheart, but you just wouldn't listen now would ya?" and boy is it loud.

Its hard to keep it together when all around you appears to be falling apart -literary or figuratively- we've all been there. We like to be in control and when things are not going right we tend to feel like we're losing grip, in comes the panic and before you know it, you're falling off the edge and fast, your mind starts to drive you crazy spinning faster than a ping ball -on not so flattering thoughts mind you. In moments like this I like to pull out, yell stop-to my brain that is- and out of all the chaos pick out one thing that I actually have some amount of control over and single-mindedly focus all my attention on it. Lets be practical here I might have no control over how the weather goes -though sometimes I wish it worked like my AC complete with a remote- or the mood my bosses are in -which can be as different and diverse as their French and Indian origins and in no way predictable, or fuss over the bloody fax machine -that's not been working for as long as I've been here by the way, or the bloody housekeeping department which finds it somewhat difficult to follow simple clear instructions which I repeat to them periodically every frigging morning! I'm drifting off here - now point is, in a world where sometimes the only thing you can control is your breathing we all need survival skills. And when I find myself at a point where things are spiraling out of control I like to compartmentalize, single out everything that's driving me crazy acknowledge but dismiss (or offer up in prayer) those issues that I cannot alter (which makes worrying about them pointless), pick out those that are well within grasp, sort them out in terms of priority (which basically to me means "which of these tasks by committing to, will bring me the most satisfaction?) that's my ranking rule. And I don't just say it in my head, I write it down too it. When I can articulate my issues and actually note them down I've half way worked through them. Out of my head and down on paper -I can literary feel the pressure ebbing off of my brain as I do it. Then I proceed to work on the said tasks like my life depended on them and the results are rewarding.

This way I'm not too hard on myself.

Coming back around..

I know I'd said I'm done for the day but just as I was about to sign out I decided to check out my rather unattended *feel free to insert any adjective here that is synonymous with 'unattended'* blog. Boy has it been long, too long, but with all the things that have been unfolding in my life lately, it's understandable. Quitting my job, getting a new one and in a foreign country, falling in love-yeah that too- it's been quite a roller coaster ride and I don't think things will be slowing down anytime soon.

Not that I'm complaining, I'm actually loving the exhilaration that comes with these changes because I'd gotten to a point in my life where I was dying for change. Life had become too mundane for me, I was just going through the motions, and was quite frankly getting fed up and real fast. A word of caution though when you pursue something so vehemently, whatever it is, you're bound to attain it and we are not always armed with the right mechanisms to cope with the all new circumstances these pursuits land us in. Much as change is a good thing if you're not prepared for it, psychologically or emotionally then you might 'crush' to say the least.

I'm all about "stepping out of your comfort zone" but we all know nothing is more scarier than doing just that. I mean you spend your whole life building a structure of friends-colleagues-family, within which you exist, and with an air of confidence because you have absolute and total control over this 'structure', then along comes visionaries who are constantly compelling us to step out of this 'safe havens' in order to attain self actualization. And that is always a hard thing to ask of any one. But with that said, we cannot stay enveloped in our cocoons solely because of fear, no! There cannot be a worse infliction on self than living in constant fear, especially of the unknown, that's a terrible way to live. It holds us back from so much, not just from attaining our full potential, but from enjoying life-which I might add flies by quite fast- to the fullest.

Lets embrace Karma, appreciate that there is a force, larger than us, that is in charge-so you don't have to run around trying to micromanage every little thing and everyone, learn to let go sometimes- appreciate also that as human beings we have the amazing ability to deal with whatever life throws at us. How else would we then explain the forever told stories about men and women who have in the past and present risen above and beyond their 'confines' to achieve great and mighty things? We are all such prolific men and women in our own little subtle ways, may we never forget that. Never be afraid to step into the 'unknown' for in so doing you sermon every perceivable force in the universe to push you forward and amazing things start to happen.

Later people. I'll try make this a habit.

xxx

Lessons from mommy

Mummy's advice.....like soothing balm to a wound.

I love the sense of security her words instill in me. Nothing is too complicated for her. She systematically talks me through whatever situation I find myself struggling with.
I trust her and not just because she's my mother but because her words are laced with wisdom, wisdom acquired throughout her lifetime (which is of course much longer than my lifetime) This definitely warrants that I listen to what she has to say. She has a way of putting issues into perspective and taking them apart piece by piece, so that by the end of it a problem does not appear as complex as it did initially. Her policy is easy, if something doesn't feel right just drop it. and move on. A lot of energy and time is lost when we try to rationalize our emotions even when we know at the core of us that something just ain't right. We should learn to trust our intuition more and avoid complicating already complex situations. Listen to your inner voice, let it guide you and you will be in less conflict with yourself.

I appreciate her now more than ever. Growing up I've come to realize that all she ever did for me (especially the spanking) she did out of love. I admire her strength because only now can I comprehend the gravity of all she has had to deal with in her life (including my rigid rebellious self...lol). She is a true reflection of the strength of a woman. And when they say that a woman is the pillar on which a home stands, there is so much truth in that.

Lets appreciate our mothers, the women in our lives. They might be intricate, temperamental but they are compassionate, and add so much colour to our lives.

x

The weekend that was...

A few things came into perspective for me this weekend. I had a lot of time to myself, I was on the road a lot (took a trip to visit grandma), hence I had time to reflect on a few things.
If you are like me - and by this I mean too busy chasing dreams or the always elusive 'paper' that you never even have time to stop and smell the roses- then you always appreciate an opportunity to get away from it all. I had one such opportunity this weekend. Took a trip out of town to visit my grandma.

Have you ever taken time to absorb the exquisite scenes of our country? Forget the congested and polluted cities I'm talking about the countryside, green and lush and air so fresh you wish you could pack some to bring back to the city. And the wildlife! No nerve wrecking traffic and people rushing about like their buts are on fire and knocking everyone else in the process (I so dislike that!) and the constant hooting! Any way the hooting can be replaced by beautiful music? Quite unlikely but hey a girl can dream.

Back to my road trip so as I was walking in the rain with my feet splashing away at the water I couldn't help but wonder why I'm so hard on myself sometimes, and we're all guilty of it sometimes. Just let it go and walk/run/jump in the rain, you'll feel five again! Remember how that felt? Carefree, busting with energy, burning up calories faster than any known diet. When friends mattered more than shoes? You should keep the spirit of play alive, it'll keep you young :)

I love my grandma and not because she dots on me and makes no apologies for it :) but because she is a very wise, kind and loving woman with a great sense of humor and witty sarcasm.
Now my grandma, special as she is, has seen many a days and the Bible is all the constitution she needs. She is a little techno-savvy, well despite the fact that the remote goes by a few names including "mobile" or whatever name comes to mind, we were watching something and she was distressed by men who are insistent on looking like women, case in point was a dude in cornrows on tv so when I tried arguing that a man is judged by what is in his heart rather than what he dons on his body.... "then why not just give him a skirt to complete the look and while you're at it throw in some pumps ?" she retorted with a smirk. " You cannot take anything such a man says seriously. The nerve.... these truly are the last days the Bible warns us about".

Her Faith is unshakable she stands for what she believes in. You have got to have full confidence in that which you propagate otherwise how will you sell it to others? You've got to be informed on the subject and let that which you stand for be what you live by.

Let it be your identity.